Since 8th grade I always wanted to become an author. I bought cute notebooks and loads of pens and began writing in them. It was so much fun and enjoyable; I loved the characters that I created, loved the stories, but one day I just stopped. I re-read them and I didn't like what I wrote and trashed them. Let's just say it was a whole lot of instalove. Like they met for ten minutes and they were already talking about marriage. That's was when I was really into romance and just wanted everyone in love, with no conflict what so ever.
As I got to the 10th grade I just stopped writing, I was so put off from people telling me there's no way I could make a living out of it and I believed them. I moved to a new town by then, but I was still going to my old school. By then 11th grade I attended a new school and I started writing again, but everything I wrote would be thrown away. I didn't like anything I wrote. Then I thought I should make write about my life, but just make it fictional. I quickly put an end to that, I thought "No one would believe that actually happened to person," or people would think it was some dramatic past story to shape the character into who she was.
Romance was longer my thing and I wanted to write about a strong group of women that was pure badass; that only used men for sex and to get whatever they want. Heck, I still want to write about that, but I can never get words down onto paper, in my head it's wonderful, but wants pen hits paper it's all gone and turned into something I didn't like.
I stopped reading in 12th grade and finally fell in love with reading again two years ago. I started reading dark erotica/romance and other things. I thought if this was what people want then maybe I should tried to write that. Hahaha, not that didn't turn out well either.
I seen books where people co written it with someone else and I thought that was a good idea, but then I realized that I don't have any books out so no one would want to work with me. So again, I was put off. The only writing I have out are the stories I wrote on different accounts on fan fiction.
Then in the summer I wrote a 4,125 first chapter. It was good and wonderful, but the moment I began to write the second chapter it all fell apart, instalove started and it was just awful.
Now here I am, lost wondering if I'm ever going to write something. I love fantasy, but I don't like world building, well I'm not good at it. I'm pretty sure I can't write contemporary and romance well. I want to write a full length novel, but the way I keep throwing things away I know it might not happen. I can't think of any good ideas for short stories or a novella.
I thought writing would be easy to do, I have so many ideas, put figuring out how to put it all down really lead to me not exploring it farther. Also the fact that I always think that people won't like it because they love romance and HEA and I don't think I can give it to them. I can't take criticism well because I suffer from depression and I cringe to think what I might think if I publish a book and got a negative review. I may want to stop writing.
As I got to the 10th grade I just stopped writing, I was so put off from people telling me there's no way I could make a living out of it and I believed them. I moved to a new town by then, but I was still going to my old school. By then 11th grade I attended a new school and I started writing again, but everything I wrote would be thrown away. I didn't like anything I wrote. Then I thought I should make write about my life, but just make it fictional. I quickly put an end to that, I thought "No one would believe that actually happened to person," or people would think it was some dramatic past story to shape the character into who she was.
Romance was longer my thing and I wanted to write about a strong group of women that was pure badass; that only used men for sex and to get whatever they want. Heck, I still want to write about that, but I can never get words down onto paper, in my head it's wonderful, but wants pen hits paper it's all gone and turned into something I didn't like.
I stopped reading in 12th grade and finally fell in love with reading again two years ago. I started reading dark erotica/romance and other things. I thought if this was what people want then maybe I should tried to write that. Hahaha, not that didn't turn out well either.
I seen books where people co written it with someone else and I thought that was a good idea, but then I realized that I don't have any books out so no one would want to work with me. So again, I was put off. The only writing I have out are the stories I wrote on different accounts on fan fiction.
Then in the summer I wrote a 4,125 first chapter. It was good and wonderful, but the moment I began to write the second chapter it all fell apart, instalove started and it was just awful.
Now here I am, lost wondering if I'm ever going to write something. I love fantasy, but I don't like world building, well I'm not good at it. I'm pretty sure I can't write contemporary and romance well. I want to write a full length novel, but the way I keep throwing things away I know it might not happen. I can't think of any good ideas for short stories or a novella.
I thought writing would be easy to do, I have so many ideas, put figuring out how to put it all down really lead to me not exploring it farther. Also the fact that I always think that people won't like it because they love romance and HEA and I don't think I can give it to them. I can't take criticism well because I suffer from depression and I cringe to think what I might think if I publish a book and got a negative review. I may want to stop writing.